I wonder...
Why the English teachers call me Bern.

They talk about us don't they? >.<

I'm bleeding. My nose's bleeding. Oh there's blood.

what will bring me home
what will make me stay, stay
what will bring me home
what will make me stay, stay
well I don't know
I don't know, ooh
I don't know
I don't know, ooh 

Get things done and over with. That's better. Yes, let two weeks later rush at me.

I'll catch it.

STARE*

You can't start a fire
You can't start a fire without a spark
This gun is for hire
Even if we're just dancing in the dark

You can't start a fire
Sitting around crying over a broken heart
This gun is for hire
Even if we're just dancing in the dark


Tegan and Sara <3


I'm mass spamming their songs now and there's so many pretty excerpts! Let's do this post by post shall we? To prevent overwhelm-ation. :D 

Stay up till Four In The Morning & the tears are pouring
& I want to make it worth the fight
What have we been doing for all this time?
Baby if we're gonna do it, come on do it right...

Oh and there was this one song which was very familiar.
So I was like OH. RGCHOIR DID THAT SONG TOO.

:D

VBC was eye-opening. 0.0

And they were sooooo cuuuuute!
LAUGHS*

The show wasn't in English so I was dazing throughout but man can they go high. I was drifting from dreamy to hey, mistake to zzz to I wish the person beside me will stop breathing so heavily.

I don't like it when people breathe loudly and they seem to do that when watching recitals. The concert hall will be so silent and there'll be heavy breathing and weird noises. 0.0

:OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
But recitals are still fun when you sit upstairs and get a bird's eye view of the entire place. Then you can study people and catch others sleeping.

oh and I should really go there for more photos.

At night probably. The spike window thing gives a GREAT view+your reflection.

Abrupt ending.

Lijiang. My god I can't wait.

@CHEWWIEWHONOLONGERVISITSTHISBLOGORMEANYMORE

VBC @ esplanade TONIGHT! WOOHOO!

Brb @ 11.

If I die young, bury me in satin
Lay me down on a, bed of roses
Sink me in the river, at dawn
Send me away with the words of a love song
The ballad of a dove
Go with peace and love
Gather up your tears, keep ‘em in your pocket
Save them for a time when your really gonna need them, oh
The sharp knife of a short life, well
I’ve had, just enough time
.


Wistful. 

And they wouldn't know! Shuttling between both - shifting into the shadows, emerging into the light.

How many roles do we play?

It's burning again.

Results were crap. Don't know how to face everyone. Don't know what to say. I shouldn't say anything at all.

At least we're singing kimi wo nosete for Choir. That gave me an idea that might hopefully, fingers crossed* work.

Refrain from commenting please. I don't need to hear anything.

It was supposed to be easy! It felt easy and I did it so easily! SHITTY RESULTS. Stop messing with my mind.

And it sends shivers down my spine. It's so tranquil. So quiet and so dark.

The shadows dance as I stare up at the ceiling and it's so soothing. So soothing.

Silent scream*

Malfoy. Malfoy. Malfoy. Malfoy. Malfoy. Malfoy. Malfoy. Malfoy. Malfoy. Malfoy.

People can get so hateful.

There's an itch that I can't scratch and it consumes me. I'm looking for the right words but they don't come and the itch burns. Oh how it burns. ah. ahhhhh. But it's good itch. It's a good itch. It'll bring me far and it'll make me wiser.

Let it BURN.

Hasta la vista baby.

The itch compels me to be offline and hard at work on the XJ master plan.

Winks*

The Convo that started the XJ Master Plan:

Two years to persuade you.
One year to train him.
One year till...

WAKAWAKAWAKA!

: ) I just felt like blabbing.

BLAB.

People are going woooooooooep private. WHY? :O WHY? :O

ROFL.
Are you really asking that?
He he hehehehehehehehee.

They want privacy don't they? I want privacy too but I suppose I'm used to this already. I won't care if you read my posts and I won't care if you judge me because this is my blog and I have my rights. Hoo Ha. I'll sulk/go high/ramble/w/e if I want to.

(Y)

She checks her pulse, gotta know if her heart's still beating 
And the hospital's, not far if anything should happen here 

She's bored in a week, big dreams but nothing material 
And I refuse to believe that love is for the weak 
I said I'm not vulnerable 

Hey lady, don't give up on me 
Don't burn your heart out love 
Till we're ash over seas 
Hey lady, said I don't wanna fight 
Like pretty girls need cowboys 
I need you here tonight 

She screams for more 
More than just some blue eyed metaphor 
and the trouble is, The trouble is: 
She's always searching. 
And the hour's late, Don't wanna hear that its all gonna end soon. 
And I'm not crazy I'm in control, and all of my friends still know 

Hey lady, don't give up on me 


Don't burn your heart out love
Till we're ash over seas
Hey lady, said I don't wanna fight
Like pretty girls need cowboys
I need you here tonight

I'm on one knee, lover please
How can I put it more simply?
And I wait, for your invitation
And I'm so so so, so over waiting
I'm on one knee, lover please
How can I put it more simply?

Hey lady, don't give up on me
Don't burn your heart out love
Till we're ash over seas
Hey lady, said I don't wanna fight
Like pretty girls need cowboys
I need you here tonight


-Hey Lady,
Thriving Ivory

Don't tell me if I'm dying, cause I don't wanna know

I'm so going to Swen Subway!

Pissy you. Stop making me feel so horrible.

AND I'M FIEND OOPS I MEAN FRIEND-LESS
Because you forgot and I'm forgotten D:

AND NEIL GAIMAN'S INTERWORLD IS NOW WITH ME! SCREAMS*


What the heck. And now you're blaming me for your stress? Oh thank you. Do note that I did those DURING my exams too okay? GRAGH. 

Taking my time on this one. Hmm. It's not procrastination. No it isn't. It's not. Really.

Big sigh*

What am I doing really?

I like to talk about 'I' and 'me' and hardly 'you'. I'm sorry if I'm self-centered.

So let me ramble about me.

I'm still looking for change. Is it happening? I'm trying. I am. But I can do better can't I? We can always do better.

I'll stay buried in Novena, my playlist, the privacy of my room, Xin Jie's master-plan, swimming at night and books - self-help, the classics, Popular, Times, books on proofs, books on writing, books on poetry, TYSes, assessments, book sales, second-hand book stores, THE LIBRARY, heaven of heavens, and my growing book-list. And friends. And you. And her. And him. I'll do this for me and you, my friend with a goal. I'll do this for me and you.

And if that doesn't change me, I hope toilet constructing in Cambodia helps. Let's get a new perspective of life. Go experience life there and get inspired bee. It says so in the brochure.

I want to watch this. Added to the Must-do list.

Do you dream, that the world will know your name 
So tell me your name 
Do you care, about all the little things or anything at all? 
I wanna feel, all the chemicals inside I wanna feel 
I wanna sunburn, just to know that I'm alive 
To know I'm alive 

Don't tell me if I'm dying, cause I don't wanna know 
If I can't see the sun, maybe I should go 
Don't wake me cause I'm dreaming, of angels on the moon 
Where everyone you know, never leaves too soon 

Do you believe, in the day that you were born 
Tell me do you believe? 
Do you know, that everyday's the first of the rest of your life 

Don't tell me if I'm dying, cause I don't wanna know 
If I can't see the sun, maybe I should go 
Don't wake me cause I'm dreaming, of angels on the moon 
Where everyone you know, never leaves too soon 



Life ftw. 


Breathe. Aren't you glad that you're alive? 

Storefront window, I reflect
Just last week I was merely heck
Tip the scale. I was hell
Picked me up, then I fell
Who's this stranger? Crowbar spine
Dot dot dot and I feel fine
Let it rain, rain, rain (rain)
Bring my happy back again


Cambodia Briefing was hilarious. I was facepalm-ing throughout. Thanks Lena. Thanks DM. Thanks external vendors. 


I could hug you. A MATH YOU SAVED ME. 


(Y)

You're a distraction. 

Isn't it funny? Not harhar funny. The other funny. 

It passes too fast. We'll be sixteen in a year and twenty-one in five. Woah. Before you know it, we'll be dead and rotting..

I shouldn't think that far.

That's not right. Not right at all.

It does.

Years will pass but you'll still remember. It seems like yesterday but then you'll wake up and realise that it's gone.

Well.

D:

It's so sad. So sad. So sudden and so sad.

I'm excited. Just two more papers. Two more papers and it's a whole new world.
Things I seriously want to do:

• Booklist! Buy/borrow the books on my booklist! OH OH I'll post it here :D*
• Start on the Xin Jie master plan! :OOOOOO Weird that I'm taking studying seriously only after the exams : P
• Try swimming at 3am in the morn. 
• Study with Brenda at our favourite haunt. 
• Cambodia trip
• Accreditations
• Archery!
• Lijiang trip
• Sleep

Silicon, saline, poison, inject me.
*Book list!

Can't stop posting. There's too many really nice, really meaningful quotes to reblog.

One last one...

Why didn’t I learn to treat everything like it was the last time. My greatest regret was how much I believed in the future.
Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close, Jonathan Safran Foer (via fuckyeahliteraryquotes) 

AH. YOU READ MY MIND.

:)

I don’t want to repeat my innocence. I want the pleasure of losing it again.
This Side of Paradise, F. Scott Fitzgerald

  

Credits: http://artismyweaponofchoice.tumblr.com/

WOAH. Tumblr ftw. Unlicensed sharing ftw.

I can't believe what you said to me
Last night we were alone
You threw your hands up
Baby you gave up, you gave up.

Facepalm and shoots myself*

Only A Math can save me now.

From the previous post:
           OH SHIT! My super uber imba post got backspaced autosaved. I'll post again after Biology.

Biology is tomorrow but I couldn't resist posting.


It rained two days ago. Do you remember? My window was filled with tears. Really pretty. I took a photo and it's on FB. So I looked through one of those tears and I saw the world

and it was upside down.

I've been wondering, if someone, anyone really, picked up the Earth and shook it - will we fall out?









little people, little floating people in vacuum.




You wish to capture that instant moment. The lost tenderness of time...

Chemistry was today and Emath was two days ago. I phailed miserably. :O I don't know what to say. Why? Why what? Why why? Why not how? Why why why. I deserved it. I didn't study till 4am and that's bad. BAD. Tomorrow's Biology. There's still A math and Chinese. Those can't be gone case or I'll really facepalm, shoot myself*  I still have time to study. Come on, let's chiong. There's no time for regrets now.

And I told her of my problems and she was sympathetic. It seems that sometimes we can feel all we want but no one will really care. Pause* Of course, they do care. It helps sometimes but it's not their problem. So.
 I suspect that we don't really care ourselves either. It seems theatrical. Our grief. You can choose to feel better but you don't want to. Why?

Maybe sometimes, it does help. To mope and sob I mean.

Does it?

I typed an uber long post but it got lost when I accidentally backspaced and the stupid thing auto-saved. 


SIGH.


I'm glad I wrote in on a piece of paper. I'll post tomorrow. Well tomorrow. OR maybe after Biology. 


Well. 

You think that you're suffering but XD guess what?

To-day we love what to-morrow we hate; to-day we seek what to-morrow we shun; to-day we desire what to-morrow we fear.

I ADMIT IT. That essay that I was supposed to do is not going to appear.  I'm lazy : P

Thank you for looking pass the rhetoric and uncovering the flaws. I'll be back with a better essay. Yeah and Rooster, please stop clucking about male superiority. Thank you.

You suck.









E-learning,
you suck too.

So do you hunger.
And you anger.
No. You're actually quite reasonable anger.
No you're not bad.

Freaking application questions.
D:

I feel like kicking myself.

Argh.

Friday: